*** an email I recieved , from a random person who i have no idea of... but thought id post it here so alot more of you can understand her pain and share it with her...
Alone, even in a room filled with people
The dead amongst living;
A ghost-girl.
Surrounded by her family, and those once called friends
She's scared of every one of them, and feels hate
For the way they smile, pretend everything's okay
Well, fuck you! she wants to scream, you were there for me too late.
Because of Him, she feels no pleasure
Can't take joy in the warmth of the sun
All the flowers and animals she once loved
She now hates, for what he has done.
Why her? She once so loved the world
Before he poisoned all passion in her heart
She's robotic, unfeeling; so afraid if she cares
Someone she trusts will again rip her apart.
She can never forgive and never forget
The scars a constant reminder of the pain
When her innocence was torn away from her
Body abused; pleas scorned with disdain.
Mutilated by petrol and flame
By the stench of her own charred flesh asphyxiated
And his twisted laughter drilling into her ears
As she sobs on the floor, humiliated.
Rope slicing into the skin on her wrists
Drowning in a cascade of salty tears
Spreadeagled; degraded; far less than a whore
And Him towering above her, mouth spread in evil leers.
No matter how much she washes and scrubs
Her body feels impure, tainted with sin
She can still feel those grubby hands on her flesh
Groping, ripping, burrowing in.
And the knife remains in her nightmares
The blade used to carve open her body
Her arms and neck, prepubescent chest
Her screams, to him, sweet melody.
She still can't sleep with the door closed
Claustrophobic from all the hours, days, weeks
She was imprisoned in a secret den with locked doors
Her body being used for sexual thrill peaks.
Sadistic excitement from seeing her blood
And the whip-weals on what once was pure
Her pain, to him, an aphrodisiac
To his insecurities, dominance the cure.
But she gives not a damn for the problems he had
He's warped her mind and beaten down her soul
Taking away all she could have had
Tarring what was innocent and whole.
She weeps over lost rainbows
All the hopes and dreams he destroyed
She'll never let herself love again
Nothing can ever fill that void.
At night, every shadow to her is Him
Coming back to harm her again
To grip her throat, and force her down
Decorate the bedroom floor with bloodstain.
Her mother still goes to visit Him
In the prison where he's iron-clad
But the girl he has broken will never again
Refer to him as her Dad.
The dead amongst living;
A ghost-girl.
Surrounded by her family, and those once called friends
She's scared of every one of them, and feels hate
For the way they smile, pretend everything's okay
Well, fuck you! she wants to scream, you were there for me too late.
Because of Him, she feels no pleasure
Can't take joy in the warmth of the sun
All the flowers and animals she once loved
She now hates, for what he has done.
Why her? She once so loved the world
Before he poisoned all passion in her heart
She's robotic, unfeeling; so afraid if she cares
Someone she trusts will again rip her apart.
She can never forgive and never forget
The scars a constant reminder of the pain
When her innocence was torn away from her
Body abused; pleas scorned with disdain.
Mutilated by petrol and flame
By the stench of her own charred flesh asphyxiated
And his twisted laughter drilling into her ears
As she sobs on the floor, humiliated.
Rope slicing into the skin on her wrists
Drowning in a cascade of salty tears
Spreadeagled; degraded; far less than a whore
And Him towering above her, mouth spread in evil leers.
No matter how much she washes and scrubs
Her body feels impure, tainted with sin
She can still feel those grubby hands on her flesh
Groping, ripping, burrowing in.
And the knife remains in her nightmares
The blade used to carve open her body
Her arms and neck, prepubescent chest
Her screams, to him, sweet melody.
She still can't sleep with the door closed
Claustrophobic from all the hours, days, weeks
She was imprisoned in a secret den with locked doors
Her body being used for sexual thrill peaks.
Sadistic excitement from seeing her blood
And the whip-weals on what once was pure
Her pain, to him, an aphrodisiac
To his insecurities, dominance the cure.
But she gives not a damn for the problems he had
He's warped her mind and beaten down her soul
Taking away all she could have had
Tarring what was innocent and whole.
She weeps over lost rainbows
All the hopes and dreams he destroyed
She'll never let herself love again
Nothing can ever fill that void.
At night, every shadow to her is Him
Coming back to harm her again
To grip her throat, and force her down
Decorate the bedroom floor with bloodstain.
Her mother still goes to visit Him
In the prison where he's iron-clad
But the girl he has broken will never again
Refer to him as her Dad.
